Tuesday, 22 July 2014

Well, reading this passed the time nicely didn't it? Yes I realise that the time would have passed anyway if you hadn't been reading it but when you think about it man invented clocks so time is artificial and if we stopped them all we could live forever..I've just invented a world full of old people and a shortage of parking spaces. Why isn't there a mechanism to deter dreamers like me?
A knock at the door was never good news in the valley, either for the person inside the house or very often for the person who knocked. You might get Cuthbert answering just as he was preparing a corpse and he had accidentally embalmed his lips so that his expression had an otherworldly quality to it or it may be Percy who had a nasty habit of stirring his tea with a Biro and then sucking the pen whilst deep in thought. This resulted in blue lips which contrasted horribly with the red hair showing from under his cap.
Since joining Thorstruck Press I need to check the new book links because the covers and ISBN's have all changed. If anyone can spare £1.80 to download one of my books onto a kindle or computer it would be a great help.
Laughter guaranteed or giggles refunded (try getting those into a jiffy-bag).

 http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00KW47UL6   Shakespeare's Cuthbert.

 http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00KVLFGV6    How Mean is my Valley.

 http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B00KVOT7KO   Tee for Two in the Valley

Glyn Sexton posted this on twitter as an entry to No1 pun.

I bow to the master.

Had lunch with the Pythons and was surprised when they 

insisted I ate all my greens. I didn't expect some kind of 

spinach imposition. ‪#‎1PUN‬
When people ask me how I manage to keep a woman like the redhead I always reply "I don't know but when I find out I'll stop doing it."  One of these days she will hear me. But seriously, you need to instill the Disney effect in your woman, make sure that she is immaculately turned out and has bluebirds twittering around her head at all times. Even better, if you have access to chloroform ask her to role play as sleeping beauty.