Percy the Mechanical Genius

Although Percy was a self-proclaimed gardner (man and boy) he also had an accidental affinity with anything mechanical. As soon as two bits of metal appeared in close proximity he would produce an oily rag, smear grease on his forehead and begin to whistle tunelessly in the time honoured traditions of mechanics everywhere. He was also adept at sucking air through his teeth and pushing his cap back on his head when asked how long the job would take.

Swimming Pools.

A friend asked why there were those irritating 

knobbles on the tiles at the edge of swimming 

pools and complained that they left indents on 

her bum when she sat on the edge. "Why are 

they there?" she wailed. "So that a blind man 

can tell where you've been" I replied. A lot of 

my friends drift away, I blame swimming 

pools.